I'll be the first to admit, insects have never really been my thing. Quite frankly, they can skeeve me out. But, just like many other things, we fear that which we don't understand and I wasn't well educated on insects when I entered this career. So you can imagine my trepidation when I discovered that working in a zoo often includes working with some notoriously creepy crawly bugs.
My first experience with some skin crawling inducing critters was in my early years at the Columbian Park Zoo. The Columbian Park Zoo had a modest collection of insects ranging from a variety of species of tarantulas to Madagascar hissing cockroaches.
Measuring in at 2-3" long and making a very audible hissing noise, if you're not familiar with Madagascar hissing cockroaches, these critters can be quite intimidating. Admittedly, I was someone who was a little unnerved by them with my initial encounters.
My supervisor at Columbian Park Zoo made anyone who was a little fearful of these bugs clean their tank if she knew you were scared of them. Well, when she sensed my hesitation with these hissers, I was scheduled for tank cleaning...
The tank looked very much like what you see above, a glass aquarium chock full of a bunch of hissy, pissy cockroaches. How does one clean an aquarium full of around fifty 3 inch roaches? One has to remove all fifty 3 inch roaches one by one, transferring them to a holding tank while the exhibit tank is cleaned.
Let me set the stage for you... To clean the tank, it is moved into the kitchen. The kitchen at Columbian Park Zoo at that time had a large window in it so that the public could view what was happening inside. So picture this... I'm leaning into a tank that's about three feet in depth and grabbing these hissers one by one. Madagascar hissing cockroaches have little barbs on their legs that make them very prickly. In the wild, this is meant as a deterrent of being eaten. In my head, my subconscious was screaming, "It's biting you, It's biting you!" resulting in me jumping every time I picked up a roach. This was limitless entertainment for the guests walking by. After about two dozen roaches though, the strangest thing began to happen...I got used to the hissers and actually began to like them. How clever of my supervisor! She knew what she was doing all along...she put me in a situation where I conquered my fear. Unfortunately, this tactic didn't work for everyone...
A bit of a pudge with a pimply face and dishwater blonde hair pulled into a half ponytail with a scrunchie, Mimi, as I'll call her, was an employee in the education department. Madagascar hissing cockroaches make excellent educational animals to use during school groups, tours, and whatnot because they are so handleable which meant they were an animal that Mimi was expected to use regularly for her educational presentations; however, Mimi was scared of the hissers. So, you guessed it, she was assigned to clean the tank. Unlucky for Mimi, not only was she scheduled to clean the tank, but I happened to be there when she was doing it. Now I had already gotten over my fear of the hissers so it was my turn to be entertained by the newbie. I can still see the look on Mimi's face...beet red and sweating bullets, she looked like she was going to cry any second. Enter moi..."Mimi, you have one on your back!" She didn't really, but it would induce a convulsing frenzy of a dance that I found so hysterical that I repeated this joke multiple times only to have Mimi react the same way each time! Fanfreakingtastic!
Turns out Mimi wasn't just scared of the hissers, she had a full blown phobia that tank cleaning didn't help but, if anything, only made worse. But that's the way it goes in this career field, folks. You either have the chops or you don't. And if you don't have the chops, you'll have a merciless coworker like me to taunt and tease you that there are hissers on your back! Mean?...maybe. I admit that, if I sense you don't have the zoo keeping chops, I can be a bit ruthless. But not everyone has that "it" factor it takes to be in this career and, if you don't, you need to get moving because these animals spend their lives in captivity and only deserve the best zoo keepers working to better their lives. So when I'm being a bonafide biatch, it's really not personal. I'm doing it for the animals to ensure they have only the best of caretakers.
Anyways, Madagascar hissing cockroaches are actually pretty awesome and I love their pissy little attitudes. Maybe because they're a little like me. *wink*
Let me set the stage for you... To clean the tank, it is moved into the kitchen. The kitchen at Columbian Park Zoo at that time had a large window in it so that the public could view what was happening inside. So picture this... I'm leaning into a tank that's about three feet in depth and grabbing these hissers one by one. Madagascar hissing cockroaches have little barbs on their legs that make them very prickly. In the wild, this is meant as a deterrent of being eaten. In my head, my subconscious was screaming, "It's biting you, It's biting you!" resulting in me jumping every time I picked up a roach. This was limitless entertainment for the guests walking by. After about two dozen roaches though, the strangest thing began to happen...I got used to the hissers and actually began to like them. How clever of my supervisor! She knew what she was doing all along...she put me in a situation where I conquered my fear. Unfortunately, this tactic didn't work for everyone...
A bit of a pudge with a pimply face and dishwater blonde hair pulled into a half ponytail with a scrunchie, Mimi, as I'll call her, was an employee in the education department. Madagascar hissing cockroaches make excellent educational animals to use during school groups, tours, and whatnot because they are so handleable which meant they were an animal that Mimi was expected to use regularly for her educational presentations; however, Mimi was scared of the hissers. So, you guessed it, she was assigned to clean the tank. Unlucky for Mimi, not only was she scheduled to clean the tank, but I happened to be there when she was doing it. Now I had already gotten over my fear of the hissers so it was my turn to be entertained by the newbie. I can still see the look on Mimi's face...beet red and sweating bullets, she looked like she was going to cry any second. Enter moi..."Mimi, you have one on your back!" She didn't really, but it would induce a convulsing frenzy of a dance that I found so hysterical that I repeated this joke multiple times only to have Mimi react the same way each time! Fanfreakingtastic!
Turns out Mimi wasn't just scared of the hissers, she had a full blown phobia that tank cleaning didn't help but, if anything, only made worse. But that's the way it goes in this career field, folks. You either have the chops or you don't. And if you don't have the chops, you'll have a merciless coworker like me to taunt and tease you that there are hissers on your back! Mean?...maybe. I admit that, if I sense you don't have the zoo keeping chops, I can be a bit ruthless. But not everyone has that "it" factor it takes to be in this career and, if you don't, you need to get moving because these animals spend their lives in captivity and only deserve the best zoo keepers working to better their lives. So when I'm being a bonafide biatch, it's really not personal. I'm doing it for the animals to ensure they have only the best of caretakers.
Anyways, Madagascar hissing cockroaches are actually pretty awesome and I love their pissy little attitudes. Maybe because they're a little like me. *wink*
oh how i love your Mondays at the Zoo segments!! this is brilliant! hehe poor mimi though!! At least she continued to try and face her fear though!! I would have loved to see that reaction though!! lol
ReplyDeleteJen xxx
omg. Lol love hearing your stories. I would die. I love animals but this just would not happen. Def not a job I'd be cut out for!
ReplyDeleteHence why YOU make the perfect zookeeper and I make the perfect spectator, visitor! ;) You're a ROCKSTAR BIATCH! Love it!
ReplyDeletexoxo
irene
www.theoplife.com
HAHAHAHAHAHA oh shit. Remind me to never piss you off!
ReplyDeleteMuch Love,
Trissta